I wrote this for our students, but it applies to all of us, young and old:
There’s a lot of stress over failure, getting “low” grades, and other types of under-achievement within our amazing student body. I am sure that you’ve had bad days or outcomes, but how have you “processed” them? As something shameful to hide or an opportunity to learn or dial back your expectations?
Anyway, this article reminded me of this topic (worth reading), and I want to try a bit of “celebrating failure” here, with my own example:
I was 21, just graduated from university, didn’t know what I wanted to do or where to work. I took an unpaid job with a start up (building a platform for matching real estate borrowers and lenders) and got to work. I was going to make a market! Well, the timing was wrong and my boss was abusive — blaming me for not being loyal enough or working hard enough, even though I was earning 80% of the firm’s revenue at times (we staffed from 2 to 6 and then back to 2).
It turns out that I was not to blame. My boss was just an asshole who used abuse to control rather than working as a partner with respect.
After 2 years of that, I was nearly burnt out but realized (via a girl I started dating) that I was in an abusive relationship. Oh, and it doesn’t help that my boss was also my step-father. (My mom had died 4 years earlier…)
I got out of there, and within a few weeks I got 3 job offers (paid!) on the same day. I took the best one (with the Vets — another story)
My one-handed conclusion: Bosses who make you feel bad are bullies, not leaders. I learned that there are always other jobs out there with people who will appreciate you. I learned from my failure…
So what’s your story of embracing and learning from failure? [hit reply!]